It's like I'm afraid to pick up the pen. I keep trying to write a song, but I feel like putting words on the page is too permanent so, for the last few songs, I've gotten into the habit of writing half the song in my head, then writing it down only when it was almost done.  

This is not working for me.  

What is working for me? My super friends. I wrote a Facebook post yesterday about fear and not writing a song and Emily said, "Just make it up."  And then Ken chimed in with, "I'm writing from 8-10pm." 

And that's what I needed to get back on the horse. Just make it up. So I did.  

It is an AABA structure song. I just need to write the last A section. I wrote it like a schoolyard song, maybe like something you might sing while jumping rope. But I'm sick and I've got this low, grumbly voice so it gives it a kind of broke down carousel/Miss Havisham kind of feel. 

Here it is: 

There was a young lady from Saskatoon, Saskatoon, Saskatoon, 

She was as crazy as a loon, as a loon, as a loon, 

She dove in the lake by the light of the moon, light of the moon, light of the moon, 

There was a young lady from Saskatoon. 

There was a young man from Tehachapi, Tehachapi, Tehachapi, 

He was as mad as a hatter could be, a hatter could be, a hatter could be, 

By the light of the moon he swam in the sea, swam in the sea, swam in the sea, 

There was a young man from Tehachapi. 

And she never laid eyes on him, and she cried herself to sleep

In the silvery light she swam alone and so did he, so did he. 

(Enter final section here) 

Are you stuck? Stop trying to open the door that won't budge and look for a different way in. This is what I had to do. Are you stuck because you're afraid of the next song not being as good or as loved as the song you've already got? That's the kiss of death. At least it is for me. Forget the stuff that's come up before, and give yourself permission to find the stuff that does not yet exist. I keep learning and forgetting this lesson over and over again. I'm thankful for my friends who reminded me how to get back on track. High five. 

In other news, it's Homecoming tonight. My son is playing in the pep band, I rediscovered a book of short stories by B.J. Novak that Emily had lent me and I love it,  and it's so good to be home. Heart emoji. 

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