Candy bags. It's that time of year again. We went to our school's Trunk or Treat Halloween night last night. It's the end of the fall quarter and, to celebrate, all the kids dress up in non-scary costumes, we eat hot dogs, chips and s'mores, play with a parachute, go through a spooky labyrinth (built by the 5th/6th graders) and get candy out in the parking lot where moms and dads stand beside their cars and pass out sweet treats. I was three pieces of candy short. I had nothing to hand out to the last three kids. D'oh.
Now we have a day off and the pillow cases of candy are slung over the shoulders of boys in pajamas with bedhead and, you know what? I'm not fighting it. It's all part of it. It's that time of year again. I'll introduce vegetables and nutrition again soon, but I'm gonna give them this moment.
We've got a day off over here and considering yard clean up, taking the glass to Lincoln (we drive our recycling in) and finally getting around to loading the dishwasher. I need to get out on that dirt road for a run or something, but it looks cold requiring the under armor. Any movement is good movement.
Any movement is good movement when you're living off kilter day after day. I'm trying to get out. I'm trying to feel better, but it feels real hard right now. If I could write something, I would. If I could be better, I would. I get glimpses of light and feeling like I can do it and then this big shadow darkens everything all over again and I'm afraid. I have cool posters for this upcoming show. I can't bring myself to put them up. I've got to get some gigs, but I can't write the emails. I can't write the songs. I can't. It sucks. You'd think one step forward would lend itself to another, but it doesn't feel that way right now.
Maybe I need my own candy bag slung over my shoulder. Maybe I should stay in these jammies with this bedhead and the kilter will come off. With sugar. Lots of sugar.